We Are Brave – A PANS PANDAS Patient Story

Hi 🙂 my name is Morgan and I have severe/extreme PANDAS disease

I have probably had it since I was four years old. I still remember even all the way back then hallucinating severely and having severe OCD and depression and very bad “feelings.” But in early 2018, my family rapidly got gravely concerned about my condition when I got strep. Either back to back or it never went away even with being on antibiotics. I was/am constantly seeing people and hearing things that weren’t really there; I have very very severe anxiety and depression as well as OCD and very very bad rages. I also have very scary feelings, almost Alzheimer’s – like feelings that scare me very much and sometimes have me completely disoriented. 🙁 I have vocal and sometimes motor tics. My symptoms continue to heighten. I have scary symptoms like I feel very dizzy, weak. Shaky, I have headaches and severe stomach pain.

The things that have brought a little bit of comfort to me are my family. They are so kind to me. They are always there for me. There have been many times (now every couple seconds) that I start seeing things and crying hysterically and ticcing and my mommy is always there to comfort me. 🙂 and when I had to go to the ER a few times (because of symptoms), my mommy was always there holding my hand even when I was scared. Another thing that comforts me a little is horses. I like to pet the horses at a stable near my house. I also like to ride them very much too 🙂 I guess my advice for a PANDAS family would to always be there for your sick child. To always tell them that they are brave. Because we are. There may only be 1 in 200 of us, but we are the bravest people on the earth 🙂

ps. Sharing this painting I did after getting some art supplies for my birthday.